Suggest improvements for the highlighted area:
Any visitor to the Ganges is likely to see a wide variety of birds. Parakeets flash by. A vulture circles above, patiently waiting for its next meal. The fork-tailed tern screams like a banshee before diving like a bomber to catch its prey. A hoopoe, with its slender, downward-curving bill, putters around looking for grubs. And long-legged storks wade through shallow waters, playing the decision close to the vest right down to the wire before snapping up fish.
- Good Figures of Speech -
Another figure of speech is the metaphor, a comparison implied by saying something is something else:
The crest on the head of the hoopoe is a fan that spreads at the sound of danger.
- Style: Use good metaphors. -
Suggestion: Use fresh figures of speech. The comparison implied in a striking metaphor can surprise or educate the reader.
Another sentence in our opening paragraph could use a comparison to make it come alive:
A vulture circles above, patiently waiting for its next meal.
With a metaphor we can paint a more vivid picture:
Above, a vulture soars in a holding pattern, patiently waiting for its next meal.
Note: Try to use only good metaphors -- those that are brief, fresh, and consistent.